Hanging Fire by Audre Lorde

In love with a boy, a fourteen years old she is the character of the story. She is an African American and he dislikes her because of that. And with that, the girl blames herself for everything. As she mentions about dying in the morning, it was maybe because of the boy. Momma’s in the bedroom with the door closed. Her mom doesn’t care and doesn’t know what is presently happening to her child.

A dance and a party were mentioned. It was tackling something about conformity because these two are both connected to social events. This issue of conformity is common to those of the teens because at these ages, everybody wants to fit in to everybody else. Again, she uttered about dying before graduation which might be she is avoiding something. At this moment, she was having self-pity and her procrastination and laziness were typically obvious in the lines, “..There is nothing I want to do and too much that has to be done..” But still, her mother is not aware of the things and she didn't even bother to let her know too. With this, their relationship with each other is not build on a strong foundation. Their communictaion with each other is not there.

Not able to join the Math Club pushed her at the peak of her self-pity. It seemed nobody trusts her skills for it. For me, it was like the next thing she was got to experience was depression because she really feels that no one listens to her and no one wants to be on her side. She feels very alone because the people around her don’t like to be with her. And with everything that happened to her, she disliked herself more and more each day maybe because of her appearance. Now it was different, she didn’t spoke the word dying but she doubts if she can still grow up and outgrow everything that had happened. But still, the thought still means is to die. The same thing is still there, the door closed and still her mom doesn’t care to know.

*With the door closed and not locked meant that they just lack that communication with each other. Her momma is inside the room not constantly checking up on her daughter which must be the thing she must do for she is a mother. And the girl, she doesn't reach out to her mom. They could have a heart to heart talk so that her mom would know everything and could advise her. And because of her insecurities of being black, she taps the idea of dying. She thought that this would be a solution to her problem. But it isn't. As death is constantly running through her mind, it had an incremental effect because the issues she is facing are getting complicated too. Just pure acceptance and appreciation for herself will surely end her anxieties.